Outrage over Elon Musk’s new Twitter verification strategy is hilarious
Can you hear the loud whine emanating from the coasts?
That chorus of dweebs comprises elite newspaper reporters, columnists and so-called influencers who have just heard the news that Elon Musk , the uber-rich new owner and CEO of Twitter , might begin charging $19.99 a month to retain “ verification ” on his dumb social media platform.
Their moans are music to my ears!
According to a positively symphonic report on The Verge website, Musk is gung-ho on shaking up the entire screwed-up system.
“The whole verification process is being revamped right now,” he tweeted.
What Maestro Musk is hinting at, the report said, is that those stupid blue checkmarks might soon cost a staggering $240 a year, and that they will be available to more folks than just CNN writers, celebrities, YouTube stars and Pete Buttigieg’s husband.Anybody can get one — Twitter té, tweegalité, tweeternité! — if they are willing to partake in one of the greatest scams since bottled water: Twenty bucks every 31 days for a meaningless stamp.
However, that badge of BS means more than life itself to members of media .
Journalists, who can barely afford a ballpoint pen, are incensed that their easiest avenue of self-styled power is about to cost more than HBO. And they’re further rankled that they could wind up no more special on Twitter than their plebian readers thanks to a checkmark bonanza. Womp womp.Waking up to find that little blue symbol next to one’s name is, for a certain superior sect of society, akin to being knighted by the king. Many excitedly announce this non-achievement. After years of toiling in unofficial obscurity, blasting out scoops and carefully crafted jokes, they’ve ascended to digital Mount Olympus . They finally matter.
Not so much, it turns out.
Verification should prove a user is real — not deem them to be more important than everybody else.
Verification signals, according to Twitter , that an account is “authentic, notable, and active.” There is an application process, but Twitter also verifies accounts themselves. The price tag, I’ll admit, is a rip-off.To those personalities who would barely exist were it not for Twitter , Evil Elon is at it again. This injustice simply cannot stand. Especially since they vastly prefer their personal Twitter accounts to the actual publications they are paid by.There is nothing writers hate more than being edited. How dare an educated coworker who knows the difference between who and whom try to make their story clearer and smarter. The gall. Writers want their pure, unfiltered feelings available to all without any fact-checking or pesky bosses getting in the way. Twitter gave them that, plus the opportunity to endlessly boast and reveal all their biases while having a checkmark just like Cher.
With Elon there and their free verification gone, some are threatening a mass exodus.
Good! Twitter would be far better off as an app on which to share photos of puppies.
Let’s be real: Twitter is a 100% toxic cesspit showcasing humanity at its absolute worst. It’s where Kanye West, with no oversight, posted his vile antisemitic message. His account was briefly frozen, and now he’s back. With a nifty blue checkmark.
Not exactly some sacred marker of reliability, is it?
The notion that we should pay more attention to, and give greater consideration to the points made by, the rarified verified is wrong.If Musk wants to open up verification to the masses, fine. The media kvetching about a totally inconsequential business move is hysterical. They can go press “submit” somewhere else.
That chorus of dweebs comprises elite newspaper reporters, columnists and so-called influencers who have just heard the news that Elon Musk, the uber-rich new owner and CEO of Twitter, might begin charging $19.99 a month to retain “verification” on his dumb social media platform. Not so much, it turns out.
Verification should prove a user is real — not deem them to be more important than everybody else.
Verification signals, according to Twitter, that an account is “authentic, notable, and active.”
The notion that we should pay more attention to, and give greater consideration to the points made by, the rarified verified is wrong.
